It has been a while since I've written. I guess this is the place where I go, when I feel like there's nowhere I can go.
Kind of sad, really. You deserve to hear also the happy times. But that feels like such a long time ago. More than a year, to be exact. Don't get me wrong, I am happy. You're not buying any of it, are you?
Well, I wouldn't either. But trust me when I say that I'm happy. Compared to what I've felt in the past - this is happy. Not extatic, but normal happiness.
The guy that I thought had broken me into pieces - I told him that I didn't want to see him anymore. The thing is though - did he get the message?
I just feel like my world is still upside down and I have NO idea how to flip it back. On the one hand I finally realize what's important in life, but on the other hand I have no clue how to find him.
Hope the prayer my heart makes every night will be heard one of these days. That my mind will finally find peace and that my heart blooms of fire.
Ever yours,
V
